Okay, kiddies. If you look up this way I’ll tell you the story of what happens when a medical examiner who eats brains to help solve cases has friends who get involved in other strange things that also involve brains. Sounds like a lot of fun, doesn’t it? And when we’re done with this episode of iZombie, you can all take your dirt nap!
- First off, let’s get to the Murder of the Week. This time, we have an amorous preschool teacher whom the children love–as do, apparently, at least three of the mommies! This leads to Mr. Sleep Around being murdered when someone takes a nail gun to his head. Can you say he got nailed? Say it. Say it again! LOUDER!
- The Three Mommies are suspects in the murder, but fortunately Liv’s (Rose McIver) visions help “nail” down the person who really did the killing: the husband of one of the mommies, who then received assistance from the mommy in covering up the murder. Once more, I’d like to point out that none of these people speak with Clive (Malcolm Goodwin) and Liv while having a lawyer present, and if I were there I would have my lawyer sitting next to me looking at Clive and saying, “Immunity from prosecution and we’ll tell you all.” Really, writers. You gotta start writing the stuff in there.
- While they really weren’t the focus of this week’s episode, it was funny as hell to watch Liv in preschool teacher mode trying to speak to suspects with sock puppets and giving them timeouts before they can answer questions, and having Clive look as if he’s finally ready to kick Liv’s ass out of the interrogation room because he’s had it with her personality changes due to the brain she’s eaten.
- Now on to the other business… First off, we discover who Major (Robert Buckley) gave the last cure to: Natalie—oh, I’m sorry, I mean “Major’s zombie hooker friend.” But Liv isn’t completely devastated; she figures she’ll go brace Blaine (David Anders) and ask him a few questions about why he stole the cure—and if that doesn’t work, she’ll beat a confession out of him.
- Except by the time Liv catches up with Blaine, who is stepping out of his piano bar gig for a moment to catch a breath of fresh air in the alley, she looks like she’s going to do more than beat a confession out of him. As a matter of fact, she’s gone full zombie and she looks like she may just snap his neck and eat his brains right there in the alley.
- Clive talks her down and brings her back to reality. Blaine says he doesn’t know anything about the cure theft and that’s the end of that.
- Speaking of Blaine having a bad day, Don E (Bryce Hodgson) , probably working under orders from Angus, pops over a few days later and tells Blaine they’ve taken all his clients. Oh, and at the same time, how about a bullet in the stomach? At the end of this mess Blaine is basically begging for his life and we all know he’s not going to die—leading to what? A discovery that the cure doesn’t work? Guess we’ll find out next week.
- Major (Robert Buckley) is now dealing with his new humanity and Justin has figured out that his newest best bud isn’t among the dead any longer. Which means he asked Major if he could ask out Liv, since we now know Major is no longer capable of doing the horizontal bop with his former fiancée, not if he doesn’t want to go back to the ranks of the undead. This leads to Justin and Liv going over to The Scratching Post so she can ask Don E if he stole the cure. Don E acts as if he doesn’t know what the fuck she’s talking about, which leads to another dead end on that front.
- The other issue Major has pending is whether or not to stay with Filmore Graves as a mercenary. He decides that he’ll keep pretending he’s a zombie because he’s pretty certain no one else is going to hire him, but in the long term this is probably a bad fucking idea within the history of bad fucking ideas, as it’s only a matter of time before he once again takes like twenty knife wounds to the stomach, or couple bullets to the chest—shit a zombie can shrug off, but will send a human to the grave faster than you can blink your eyes. Then again, Major has never really been known for making good decisions, so at least he’s staying in character.
- Peyton (Aly Michalka) is now working on the case of the guy who killed the dominatrix and she’s ready to offer him a sweet deal if you’ll give up the memory card with all the recorded sessions on them. The dude’s lawyer is ready to take the deal—and that’s when some high-powered suit walks in, whisper something in the murderer’s ear, and suddenly becomes the defendant’s new legal beagle. This shark tells Peyton that they’re willing to take a thirty year rap for murder and, oh, the memory card doesn’t exist: it never existed. She thinks this is rather unusual behavior on behalf of a client’s lawyer, and she thinks it’s even stranger when she’s told later that the defendant was found “hung” in his cell. (I don’t know how they do things in Seattle, but I’m from Chicago, which is why we put the quotes around the word hung—’cause you know the guy found in the cell didn’t hang himself.)
- This leads Peyton to visit Ravi (Rahul Kohli) because she has an idea. Since they’ve got the defendant on the slab that means they’ve got a fresh brain. And since they have an undead friend who can take on another person’s personality and memories when they eat said brain, she’s hoping they can convince Liv to chow down on this one so they can find out what exactly happened to cause this guy to kill himself. Ravi’s not exactly certain that Peyton will find everything she’s looking for if they go with a regular Brain Bake—
- But Ravi has a surprise! He pulls out the brain, sticks it in a jar, and douses it with his extra special Blue Juice. He tells Peyton that in a couple of weeks the brain will be prepped and when Liv munches on that, she’s going to have extra intense visions that will likely tell them a whole lot more than they would find through a regular vision. Ravi is smart enough to know, however, that Liv is probably going to be pissed off at them for having her eat this brain, because let’s face it, this dude was kinda skeevy. Not to mention that this will likely be the first time she’s been on both sides of a crime, which is screwed up no matter how you look at it.
- Last but not least, our Intrepid Zombie Hunters show up on a road that is being guarded by Fillmore Graves personnel, one of whom they run over. Wouldn’t you know, it’s Justin. And wouldn’t you know, Justin zombies the fuck out and chases after the truck trying to get to the driver and his passenger. The IZH managed to get away and, wouldn’t you know, they happen to have a GoPro camera stuck on their dash—and it just happened to catch all that magnificent zombie action as it went down. All that remains now is for these two losers to upload their footage to their message board and we can start the countdown clock for the beginning of World War Z, Seattle Style.
Personal Note: With six remaining episodes—five, actually, as a last two episodes consist of one story—we have a whole lot of stuff happening. The zombie cure is missing; Blaine is being muscled and he may or may not be dying; Major is running the risk of still dying if he continues doing zombie mercenary work; the case of the missing memory card may only be solvable by Liv chowing down on the Blackmailer’s Basted Blue Brain; and Filmore Graves may have to start doing some proactive work to keep the Seattle Zombie Underground remaining that way. The gates of been thrown open and all sorts of crazy shit is liable to happen within the next few weeks. And with Rob Thomas’ promise that there is going to be a “major reset” at the end of this season, it’s likely we can’t even begin to guess just how crazy shit will get.
And speaking of major resets… This is the end of the line for me recapping this season of iZombie. With next week’s episode Rachel is taking over and will do the next six recaps, leading everyone to the end of the season. Reason for this is that I’m in the process of getting through Sense8 and, in two week’s time, I’ll begin recapping Fear the Walking Dead, followed the week after that by the last season of Orphan Black. That is what is known in this business as “Way too much work goin’ on,” so like the good friend she is, Rachel is going to help out. And given that she’ll probably be in the position of having to recap three or four shows at the end of this year, I’ll offer the same support.
I thank you all for following these recaps, and I hope you found them both enjoyable and entertaining. And next year when Season 4 shows up, I can assure you I will be here to begin recapping Episode 1. Assuming, of course, that I’m not a zombie myself, which would kinda suck since I don’t look real good with white hair.
Take care everyone, and enjoy those brains.
Rachel Tsoumbakos: Thanks so much for recapping the first half of Season 3 of iZombie. It is always a pleasure to read your interpretation of each show. Usually, too, you do a much more thorough job than I do, so, fans, I apologise in advance for my recaps 😉
Also, I really can’t wait for your next recap of Sense8 or your upcoming ones on Fear the Walking Dead.
As always, leave a comment below and tell us how we did!
Liv (Rose McIver)
Ravi (Rahul Kohli)
Major (Robert Buckley)
Clive (Malcolm Goodwin)
Peyton (Aly Michalka)
Blane (David Anders)
Justin (Tongayi Chirisa)
Don E (Bryce Hodgson)